Why and how to persuade your partner to use a condom

Condom

The decision about whether to have sex is extremely important. Considerations include the possibility of contracting an STD, the potential for an unwanted pregnancy, and the psychological and emotional ramifications of intimate contact should the relationship end. Sex represents a psychological, physical, emotional, and financial commitment to another person. Don’t be reluctant to bring up the topic of safer sex. The ability to discuss important issues is a sign of personal and social maturity.

However, it can be challenging to talk about using condoms with your partner; but, you shouldn't let embarrassment become a health risk. The person you are thinking about having sex with may not agree at first when you say that you want to use a condom when you have sex. These are some excuses and some answers that you could try…

Excuse: I am afraid to ask him to use a condom. He’ll think I don’t trust him.
Answer: If you can’t ask him, you probably don’t trust him.

Excuse: It is up to him…it is his decision.
Answer: It is your health. It “should” be your decision too!

Excuse: I’m on the pill, you don’t need a condom.
Answer: I’d like to use one anyway. It will help to protect us from infections we may not know we have.

Excuse: Don’t you trust me?
Answer: Trust isn’t the point. People can have reflections without releasing it.

Excuse: I can’t feel a thing when I wear a condom;
Answer: Maybe that way you will last even longer and that will make up for it.

Excuse: It does not feel as good with a condom.
Answer: I’ll feel more relaxed. If I am more relaxed, I can make it feel better for you.

Excuse: I don’t stay hard when I put on a condom.
Answer: I’ll help you put it on and that will help you keep it hard.

Excuse: I don’t have a condom with me.
Answer: I do.

Excuse: It just isn’t as sensitive and I can’t feel a thing.
Answer: Maybe that way you will last even longer and that will make up for it.

Excuse: Putting it on interrupts everything.
Answer: Not if I help you put it on.

Excuse: I guess you don’t really love me.
Answer: I do; but, I am not risking my future to prove it.

Excuse: I will pull out in time.
Answer: Women can still get pregnant and get an STI from pre-ejaculate (pre-cum).

Excuse: But I love you.
Answer: Then you’ll help us to protect ourselves.

Excuse: Just this once.
Answer: Once is all it takes.

Excuse: I am not having sex with a condom, period.
Answer: Then “No raincoat, No playing in the rain, period. Take it or leave, period.

Here are some guidelines for proper use:


➥Use one every time you have sexual intercourse or oral sex involving a penis.
➥Use only latex or polyurethane condoms.
➥When having vaginal or anal intercourse, make sure the condom has nonoxynol-9.
➥When the condom is on the penis, there should be about a half-inch of space left at the condom tip to hold the ejaculation.
➥Withdraw the penis soon after ejaculation. Hold the base of the condom firmly against the penis as it is withdrawn so the condom does not come off.
➥Use foam, spermicide, or a female condom in combination with a condom.
➥Check for possible breaks immediately after use of any condom.
➥Always use a water-based lubricant such as K-Y jelly. Vaseline or other oil-based lubricants can cause the condom to break down and become ineffective.
➥Never reuse a condom.
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