Premarital counseling — Invest in your marriage before you get married!

Couple angry at each other
/Courtesy

Premarital counseling is a type of couple’s therapy for couples intending to get married. Premarital counseling has historically taken place in religious institutions, but an increasing number of non-religious couples have begun seeking this type of guidance too. Premarital counseling helps a couple to build a healthy relationship, creating a stronger foundation for their marriage.

Premarital counseling is aimed at helping a couple identify their areas of weaknesses to prevent these from causing problems in their marriage. This form of counseling also encourages discussions between partners about areas which can affect their marriage, such as finance, sex, values, religious beliefs, anger management, individual responsibilities in marriage, and desire to have children.

During premarital counseling, both individuals are encouraged to communicate their fears, concerns, and desires openly, and evaluate their expectations for marriage. People are influenced by their experiences and upbringing and this usually affects their behavior in a relationship. Premarital counseling helps a couple identify such behaviors and attitudes which may not match their partner’s, therefore, helping both parties better understand each other.

Indeed, there are a variety of reasons couples may go for a couple’s therapy before marriage. Below are some of the top benefits of premarital counseling for all couples.


Help build better communication skills among couples.


When couples go to counseling, they talk together with a counselor or religious leader who has the training needed to help them better understand one another. Couples who go through this type of counseling inevitably build better communication skills because they have a neutral party there to help them understand one another. No doubt this is one of the biggest benefits of premarital counseling. In addition to learning how to better communicate individual needs and desires, couples also learn how to better understand each other. They gain compassion and communication skills that will get them through the tough times.

Provide couples with an opportunity to address issues.


Premarital counseling also provides a great opportunity for couples to confront issues that could lead to divorce before they become serious. By talking with a counselor, couples may be able to settle money disagreements or talk about their plans to have children. Addressing issues before marriage is the best way to ensure a solid foundation for the future and to avoid serious conflicts after the big day. Of course, it’s important for couples to be candid when they attend premarital counseling. That’s the only way to realize the benefits of this time-honored tradition.

Helps couples plan the future.


Many premarital counselors do more than just help couples talk through their current issues. They also help them to actively plan for the future. A counselor can help couples set financial or family planning goals, and can help them find ways to accomplish those goals. Premarital counseling is the perfect place for couples to talk about the expectations that they have for married life and what they want personally in the future too. Premarital counselors help their clients focus on healthy goals and relationship changes.

Provides a chance for couples to absorb wisdom.


Talking with someone who has been married for a long time is another big benefit of seeking premarital counseling. When you talk to a counselor, you benefit from a voice of wisdom on the subject of marriage. It’s more than just someone sharing what they’ve learned from a book. It’s someone sharing what they’ve learned from real life. In fact, many premarital counselors have struggled with the trust, intimacy and financial issues that tend to plague young couples. They can provide tested advice and essential encouragement.

Allows couples to discover new things about themselves.


Counselors ask a lot of questions when they’re working with engaged couples. Listening carefully to your partner’s answers is a great way to learn more about that individual. Yes, many couples perceive that no one knows their partners better than they do. However, counselors can help bring out important information that a partner might have been reluctant to share. This offers great growth opportunities while helping couples learn more about each other. It’s also a safe space for individuals to share things that they are nervous or upset about with their partners. It can be particularly helpful if one individual in the couple has been in failed relationships before.

FINAL WORD

How would your life be different if you could discuss important issues prior to getting married, instead of discussing those issues while being married? Premarital counseling helps decrease frustration and anger about issues impacting the relationship, and when you know upfront what you are getting into and what your mate’s thoughts are about marriage, you will not be shocked when certain issues arise. Being informed, helps you to make some informed decisions, and this is what premarital counseling does, it helps you to be informed and make decisions with clarity and with your emotions.
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