Just had my second failed IUD insertion attempt

African woman reading a magazine

I first tried to get an IUD about two years ago, but I couldn't handle the pain. The nurse wasn't even able to measure my uterus because she couldn't get the sound through my cervix. I wasn't expecting the experience to be a cakewalk, but it was honestly the WORST pain I've ever experienced. It shook me up pretty badly, and I ended up sobbing in the car for a solid half-hour after I left the clinic.

Fast-forward to last night. I'd been trying to mentally prepare myself for months to give it another go, and I thought it might be better this time around because I'd know what to expect. I went through all the pre-insertion stuff just fine. The assistant was super helpful in going through my history, listening to my concerns, and answering any questions I had. The nurse was great too and really helped to calm my nerves as she explained the process.

Until the time came to bite the bullet. As soon as she said "Alright, let's have you lay back then", it was like a switch went off in my brain. I froze, and when she asked me if everything was okay, I just started shaking and sobbing uncontrollably on the spot. The poor nurse did her best to calm me down and understand what was wrong, but I couldn't even articulate why I was so upset beyond "last time really sucked". I still don't really understand why I lost my shit so suddenly. We ended up calling it quits, and she renewed my mini-pill prescription for now.

I just...I'm so disappointed and frustrated that I can't seem to make this work. It sounds like my only option now is to be sedated for the insertion since I apparently can't even start the process anymore without having a full-blown anxiety attack.

Explaining the Insertion Procedure

A woman who has chosen the IUD needs to know what will happen during insertion. The following description can help explain the procedure to her. Learning IUD insertion requires training and practice under direct supervision. Therefore, this description is a summary and not detailed instructions.

The provider uses proper infection-prevention procedures.

The provider conducts a pelvic examination to determine the position of the uterus and assess eligibility (see Screening Questions for Pelvic Examination Before IUD Insertion). The provider first does the bimanual examination and then inserts a speculum into the vagina to inspect the cervix.
The provider cleans the cervix and vagina with appropriate antiseptic.

The provider slowly inserts the tenaculum through the speculum and closes the tenaculum just enough to gently hold the cervix and uterus steady.

The provider slowly and gently passes the uterine sound through the cervix to measure the depth and position of the uterus.

The provider loads the IUD into the inserter while both are still in the unopened sterile package.

The provider slowly and gently inserts the IUD into the uterus and removes the inserter.

The provider cuts the strings on the IUD, leaving about 3 centimeters hanging out of the cervix.

After the insertion, the woman rests. She remains on the examination table until she feels ready to get dressed.
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